Sephiroth's Musical Debut!
by Captain Chibi Buckle
Summary: Yeah! Sephiroth sings the coconut song! Well, that's towards the end, but still. Tis fun! I hope all who reads this enjoys it. please R&R!


This story stars EVERYONE, that being Cloud, Tifa, Aerith, Barret,  
Yuffie, Cait Sith, Red 13, Vincent, and Cid. Um ,and Sepiroth.  
(drools) Well, okay. I think that's everyone then. Oh, and I refer to  
*Aeris as *Aerith, because I've heard rumors that her name was  
mistranslated, plus Aerith really does sound cooler. So Yay! Enjoy!  
  
Oh, and I don't own any of these characters blah blah blah.  
  
The group, Avalanche, trudges up a mountainside in silence. Cloud and  
Cid walked side by side, looking pissed. Tifa walked along side Barret  
and Yuffie, who was having a fit of giggles. Aerith followed closely  
behind them, with a pleasant, dazed look upon her face. Vincent strode  
along in the back with Cait Sith and Red 13 at either side.  
  
They had just left Nibleheim hours early.  
  
(Hours Earlier, in the Shinra Mansion)  
  
Yuffie: Cloud, have you ever kissed a girl? (All stare at her, then  
turn their eyes to Cloud.)  
  
Cloud: Why do you want to know that?  
  
Tifa: Yeah, really Yuffie. We're on a mission.  
  
Yuffie: I'm just curious. (pause) Have you ever kissed Tifa? (Tifa and  
Cloud blush)  
  
Aerith: Ooohh, I think we have lovebirds in the group.  
  
Cait Sith: Yeah, we'll have to watch them, make sure they behave!  
(Tifa stops blushing.)  
  
Tifa: I've never kissed Cloud.  
  
Barret: Aren't we supposed to be doing something important?  
  
Red 13: Yeah, like saving the world?  
  
Aerith: That can wait just a bit. Now I'm curious.  
  
Yuffie: Have you ever kissed anyone?  
  
Cloud: Yes! A couple of weeks ago, okay? Now let's get back to what's  
important.  
  
Vincent: Yeah, we really should - (he pauses and looks at Cloud) wait  
a minute, that's when we were at the Golden Saucer, right? (Sweat drop  
appears over Cloud's head)  
  
Cloud: Yeah, so? (All look at him)  
  
Vincent: Who did you kiss then? (He looks to the girls)  
  
Tifa: I was with Barret and Vincent.  
  
Yuffie: I was with Red 13.  
  
Aerith: We hung out for a bit, but then I left and was with Cait Sith.  
And nothing happened. (All eyes shift to Cid.)  
  
Cid: Hey, I was drunk. All I remember was flirting with this real  
pretty blonde girl. (Cloud takes a step back.) Yeah, I made out with  
her, but not Cloud. You sickos.  
  
Cloud: Oh God, I was drunk too. I swear I thought I was with Tifa.  
(All eyes open wide.) Well, she was really strong! She even picked -  
  
Cid: You up and laid you on a bed? (Cloud and Cid look at each other  
in horror.)  
  
Cloud and Cid: Oh God, what've we done?! (They turn and vomit.)  
  
Tifa: Well, um, this is awkward. (Yuffie starts to giggle.)  
  
Barret: I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear any of that just now.  
  
Yuffie: Hee hee hee! Cid and Cloud, sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G!  
  
Cait Sith: Well, they were intoxicated. They didn't know any better.  
  
Vincent: Okay, let's just go, now.  
  
All leave the Mansion and head towards the mountains, with Yuffie  
giggling.  
  
(Flash forward - somewhere on the mountains.)  
  
Sephiroth: (Drops Jenova down.) God, you're heavy! What the hell was I  
thinking, bringing you?  
  
He sits on a rock and looks around.  
  
Sephiroth: Man, I'm bored. This bad guy shit sucks. I need something  
to kill some time.  
Sephiroth starts to tap his fingers on his knee. He looks at his  
surroundings again, eyeing ever detail carefully. When he has decided  
that he is alone, (exception to Jenova,) he closes his eyes and  
tilting his head back, he begins to hum a tune. Sephiroth's foot  
starts to tap now.  
  
Sephiroth: Hm, hm, hmm. (He stands up and stretches, looks around  
again.) You put the lime in the coconut and drink them both together.  
Da da da, hmm, la la. (His voice is high pitched for this part, and  
this part only!) I said doctor! Hey! Doctor!  
  
He turned to Jenova, and started to dance.  
  
Sephiroth: (Pointing at her, err, it, or whatever.) You put the lime  
in the coconut and drink them both together, put the lime in the  
coconut, then you'll feel better!  
  
(Elsewhere, in the mountains.)  
  
Yuffie: What does Sephiroth have to go the hard ways?  
  
Cait Sith: Do you think you could shut your trap for a second?!  
  
Yuffie: Why you little!  
  
She grabs Cait Sith be the neck and starts to shake him, with the Mog  
holding tightly to his feet.  
  
Cait Sith: Help! Cough, gulh, ack, Oh God help me!  
  
Cloud rushes over and saves him from Yuffie.  
  
Cloud: Will you two stop arguing! You've already caused enough  
trouble. (Eyes Yuffie.)  
  
Aerith: (Gasping.) Do you hear that?! (Everyone looks at her.)  
  
Red 13: What is it?  
  
Tifa: Can you hear the Ancients?  
  
Aerith: Yes! They're calling! (She drops to the ground.)  
  
Cloud: What are they saying?  
  
Aerith: We have to put something in a, in a, coco bean? No wait,  
something for a doctor?  
  
Aerith stands up, looking puzzled. All eyes are on her as she takes a  
few steps and stops. She turns to a hill and rushes towards.  
Aerith: The Ancients are this way, come on!  
  
Everyone rushes up the hill, Aerith in their lead. They all abruptly  
stop at the top, and their jaws drop. Sephiroth is waving his arms in  
an odd fashion. He has gone back to his high-pitched singing; his back  
is to the group.  
  
Sephiroth: I said yeah ah ah! Is there nothing I can take? I said  
doctor, to relieve this bellyache? Oh whoa ah ho! Hey! (He spins  
around.) You put the. (His eyes fall on the group before him, he loses  
the high pitch.) Lime, in the coco, nut.  
  
Sephiroth's arms fall to his sides as a neon sign flashes AWKWARD  
above his head.  
  
Sephiroth: Oh fuck.  
  
He slowly backs towards Jenova, and picks the thing up over his  
shoulder. Sephiroth stares at the group, edging his way out of sight.  
When he is gone, Cloud looks to the ground.  
  
Cloud: This really isn't my day. 


End file.
